Where am I going and why am I in this handbasket?

By now the whole world is aware of the global pandemic facing earth. We saw it coming, they warned us, countries began to see more, things began to change. Canada has jumped onboard the social distancing and 2 week quarantine measures, and we will soon see if they are working. Some people are being stupid idiots and still going out to gather with friends, walk around town, and such. Please. No. Please stop. 

So in the middle of the craziness, just as things were taking off on Monday of this week, March 16, I was in the middle of a DKA event. Diabetic Ketoacidosis, among other things and found myself making the decision to come to the hospital during the global pandemic. I had put it off for 24 hours, but was in excruciating pain and didn’t really know why at the time. All I knew was I very unwell and needed someone to tell me what is going on. Going a clinic was pointless. I had been trying to get into a clinic for the past month with no luck. Long lines if they are open at all, which is more the case. Finding a page of paper taped to a window saying no docs for the clinic today became the party line. So off I headed to the hospital. In the middle of a pandemic event.

Turns out I would have likely died had I not come in that day. Good call then! My DKA was quite severe and my liver was also acting up on old sludge from before I had my gall bladder out. In any event, I have found myself in a hospital bed this week, with just a few days before I can go home.

It was eerie coming here. When I arrived I was stopped by a screener who asked about symptoms and decided whether you put on a mask or not. I knew I wasn’t sick with Covid-19, or assumed I wasn’t and thought simply my pancreas as I have had that pain before. Told her that I threw up, which I did. MASK ON PLEASE! And hand sanitizer. Righto. I am the only person waiting in chairs and one other person is getting checked in. That is it. I have never seen an ER waiting room so dead on arrival. No screaming kids, no homeless people looking for comfort, no drug seekers looking for a dose. Just a guy who slammed into a pole while playing tennis, gave himself a concussion. Off I go to be triaged, then I am brought into the second waiting area. Bigger, but still not many folks. I think I counted 4. Moved along to another bed for exam and then into yet another waiting room to wait for tests and doc, etc. Then I find out I am being admitted, possibly for a bowel obstruction (ruled out with xray), and then for possible pancreatitis, which I have had before. No bed for me, so there I sat, admitted, having had several tests, and med reconciliation whilst sitting in a chair all night. Beds are busy on the ward they say, which is entirely possible. There were five recliner chairs in my room. There were never 5 patients all night. It just didn’t get that busy. Word on the hall was people stopped treating it like a walk-in clinic with the risk of Covid-19 on the menu. 

Finally get admitted to a bed only to find it is a bed along a wall in someone else’s room. Whatever. I am so exhausted having not slept for two days, I did not care and I met my roomie, who was from Salt Spring Island so we chatted a bit. I was feeling quite miserable by that point so spent a lot of time in a fog. Doctors and specialists came and went, lab techs came and went, nursing staff, health care aides, etc not to mention the many nurses who tended me. I spent one night in that room only to be moved again the next day as it was just too crowded in the room for two medically complex cases. Can’t fit all the docs or the equipment needed to treat us! Fine by me - gave me a private room that overlooks the city I live in. I can see my walking route that I hide rocks on from here. I am still feeling like death must be imminent as life could not be this miserable. Tests, pokes prods, etc. Then I coughed and by god, you would think they all shit their pants. I had trouble breathing too, not unusual for DKA, but that was it - I think that was what drove me to get my own room. Soon there were signs on my door and full precautions were being taken. Full face mask with plastic splatter shield, gloves, and gown. Every single time they came and anyone came and went from my room, this happened. They had so much garbage to throw out at the end of the day with all of that, much needed of course, and that is not a complaint, simply a comment on how serious they were taking my health, their own, and the health of anyone they come into contact with. 

I was tested for Covid-19 and last night informed that I was NEGATIVE. Yahoo. Precautions could be taken away and then I could see the faces of the people who were taking such good care of me.

I am not going to lie - it has been a bit frightening to be in here during a global pandemic. I had my social distancing plan in place - I was meant to head to the farm on Tuesday to spend a week or more with my daughter and her partner and play with my grandanimals. Instead here I am, sitting on the 8th floor looking over the city I love, wondering if it will ever go back to normal, wondering just how crazy it will get. People are panic buying all kinds of shit, and causing such panic in others who cannot afford to stock up as they live check to check. Costco and Walmart seemed to be the nut zones. I have been here all week, so much has changed while I’ve been sitting high in the hospital tower. Schools have closed indefinitely, borders have closed, some provincial, university classes cancelled, workplaces closed indefinitely, Covid-19 assistance offered, mortgage freezing, and so on. Just how long have I been here??? How did it all unravel so fast? 

My plan is still to head to the farm and social distance myself with my daughter and her crew. I had only intended to pop over for a week, but the way this week has taken a turn, I may stay until the craziness subsides. I am not sure. There is talk of closing the ferries down to the small islands. I don’t like the feeling of being trapped, but where else would I be than with my daughter during such a time in our life’s history? The last global pandemic of this magnitude was in 1918 and 50 MILLION people died and 500 MILLION were infected. We do not want to go there. I am hoping this is the only pandemic of this size that my daughter has to face in her lifetime. We have had smaller ones like SARS, H1N1, and so on, but not to this extent with this amount of global reaction to shutting it down. Many countries are just closed. As in don’t come knocking, stay in your house and quarantine until we tell you it has passed. 

So for a few funny not funny stories from the hospital tower this week. I know you are mostly at home bored already with the isolation and having a house full of kids, so this is a long post. 

First night in with my roomie from Salt Spring Island, I had to get up to the bathroom. I have an IV at that point, and the pole must be unplugged each time and dragged with me to the bathroom. Not wanting to turn on all the lights in the 2am night, I thought I could get back from the bathroom, plug my IV pole in and off to la la land I would go, given the pain meds were good, and I was so very drowsy. Well no, that wasn’t going to happen. Instead I get all snarled up in the tubes to my arm, the cords to and from the IV pole and before I know it, we are all going down, with the pole headed towards my roommate...CRASH BANG WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN HERE?? I sat on the bed and pushed the buzzer. Someone else was going to have to sort this mess out. I was far too woozy to be on my feet. Lovely Health Care Aide Vincente shows up and sorts the whole mess out, no worries he said. 

Then last night, I want a gown change as the catheter that was once terrorizing my bladder is out, blood has been spilled along with food and I felt gross. Nurse comes in to help me out as there are three IV lines running now and two poles to manage. We disconnect from the one and roll the other into the bathroom. I think she was going to check the tape on one of my IV sites but oops, that was not just holding it down that was the actual IV. “FUCK I can’t believe I did that” says unnamed nurse. Then she apologized for swearing. I told her FUCK is the perfect word for the situation as I am pouring my blood all over the place, gown, floor, hand, etc. Sticking me for all the blood draws (every few hours) and new IV sites has left me a bit of a bruised state with collapsed veins. So she has to call the IV team - wait, they have a team that does this? Yup. Enter Sherry, the guru of all things vein related. Sherry sorted it out. Turned out neither of the sites were in the best shape and needed replacing with better stuff. I told Sherry, I am yours Yoda. Do with me as you will. And she did. Got some good veins after much looking and warm blankets for my arms (brings up the veins). 

And then we have today. I am wearing a hospital gown. They are not meant to look pretty, that much is clear. They don’t fit well, have missing buttons and snaps, and because I wasn’t planning to stay this long - I have long since run out of undies. Yup, my bare ass is hanging out and someone has forgotten to shut my room door as they left as I shuffle back and forth with my IV pole to the bathroom. I am not sure how many were flashed. I don’t even have a great ass anymore. I lost some weight recently and it appears to have come directly off my ass. Can’t even keep a pair of pants (or undies) up for fuck’s sake. No bum to hang them off of. I finally realize that the door is open and shut both the door and my back door and wrap the gown around me. Ah, hospital life. 

So there you have it, my first Covid-19 Global Pandemic post. I will try to come back and post as things evolve here. Who knows where this is all headed. Stay safe people and for fuck sake, socially isolate NOW! It is not hard! Someone is telling you to go lay on the couch and watch tv - friggin do it!

 This is what you draw on when you have no rocks to paint.